Thinking I really should take some time out to ‘really’ do some blogging. My goal when I started was to use ‘the truth about mummy’ as my own personal therapy page to work out who I am going to be now I’ve finished having babies. It’s worked so far – but maybe I’ve gotten a little side tracked. I spend so much of my meagre ‘me time’ chasing down and reading everyone's blogs that I don’t find I do much quality writing. I’m loving the little life gems people put out in their blogs. It’s like a treasure chest of human learning – all right there for the taking. And then there are all the wonderful craft and sewing pages – I’ve been wasting heaps of time chasing down patterns too! Having said all this I’m a big believer that side tracks and detours often lead to the best destinations – so I guess I have little to complain about.
So to me. I’m really aware at the moment that this is my last week of being a pre-school mummy with all my kids at home, safe under my maternal wing. The biggest pink starts school next Thursday. I washed her uniform a few days back and hung it on the line to dry. I audibly gasped when I turned around and saw a uniform hanging on the line for the first time. She is ready to go and I think in many ways I’m ready too – but I am very aware what I huge step it is in our lives and know I’m going to miss the constant contact we’ve had for the past five and a half years.
There is something almost magical about being a mummy. These little beings begin and grow inside us. They are born from our pain and completely depend on us for their every need. It’s not a wonder we share such an immense bond and they tug so strongly on our emotional core. But from that point onwards our jobs is to make them gradually less dependent until they can function totally without us. School is the next step in the big pinks and my journey towards this. My heart is breaking slightly while my mind and reason see that the journey is progressing as it should. (Okay I’m getting way to philosophical here – If you haven’t already moved onto the next blog I promise to stop!)
Nope – there is nothing else much there – that must have been what I needed to get out tonight. It’s the journey thing. Motherhood is a journey, a roller coaster and spiritual experience. I'm here living and feeling it along with all my other mummy friends.